it's the little things

Now that I've confessed shared my deep dark house secret [a tad melodramatic?], I would like to focus on a tiny but super awesome victory: my pink bathromm drawer pulls. Sweet little projects like these [yes, there are others which means I'm way behind on my posts] have started to crack the great big barrier between me and the so-called "light at the end of the tunnel." There is no light. Only a teeny glimmering creating a space not quite as black as the rest. I can't even see those little dust particles swimming around in the air yet. But I can see the glimmering. Thanks to these bad boys.

Before:

After:

Thank you oil rubbed bronze spray paint. You're my new favorite.

selena gomez, beer, and puppies.

Yup. That about covers it.

a sad state of affairs

I'm finally getting around to it, but I'm not particularly enjoying it or excited about it. I'm not really sure how I decided today was the day. My typically short drive home from work ended up being just long enough to for the idea to pop into my head and stay there. Drat. Drat, I tell you! I wanted to stay in denial. To ignore the blatantly obvious fact that we have more to do than we have time for. [If anyone so much as hints at an "I told you so" I will unfriend you on facebook and submit your email to receive an endless amount of e-newsletters.] A good percentage of my brain still believes we'll make the deadline, but the photos provide pretty hard evidence that all hope is lost. Period. And now I'm officially stalling. I'll continue to stall for a bit. Anyone want to hear about the strange dream I had last night where me and my friend Sarah (you're gonna love this, carebear) were trying to teach another girl how to use eyebrow powder and accidentally bleached my eyebrows instead? Ok, well that was kinda it. It was super hot guys.


Ok, fine. Here goes.


























Uh...........


































Ok, for real. Please try to hold the gasps to a minimum.

Excuse me while I bury my face in my hands and sob.


One month! That's all we have until we move in. As the title suggests, it's a sad state of affairs. We've been working hard! Really hard, guys...but, man! OknowthatIpostedthatpleasecomehelpme! We're thinking a painting party?! With beer. And pizza. Who's down?


Oh, and if anyone isn't feeling sorry for me yet, this should help. I still have to pack up our. entire. house. Sad face, people. Sad face. This place is pretty much the only thing that keeps me going. That and the cold beer I'm about to abandon you for.








PS: Any paint colors/ideas/words of encouragement happily accepted!


[interesting fact: I've now been staring at this post for 15 minutes trying to convince myself to hit "publish post". Okheregoes.]

me and fall are BFFs.

Autumn let's make a deal, I'll start celebrating you now by wearing boots (and other fall attire) if you agree to stick around for a while. Enticing enough for you? I'm sure my friends would also don leggings and such to encourage you to stick around. Please, oh please won't you stay? We can be BFFs. Look I even bought these today. Just for you.

And I've been window shopping for weeks now. I even put a couple outfits together in hopes of impressing you.

I'd really like to believe this cold front is the beginning of a wonderful relationship...and not just a tease. Stay a while, wontcha?

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On another note guys, you have to visit ShoeDazzle. It's kind of amazing. It's basically a shoe of the month club, except there are also purses and jewelry. You take a style quiz, and every month there is a showroom personalized for you! If you don't like anything in your showroom that month (or just received your cell phone bill and realize you need to cut back on something, eeek!) you can always opt out for the month. AND you don't pay anything until your first purchase. [I've been looking at showrooms for months people and just made the leap today] Oh, and did I mention, if the shoes don't fit (or you don't like 'em once you get 'em) just send those puppies back and exchange for another pair! Do I sound like I work for them? Cuz I totally don't–I'm just super excited. Wanna know the very best part?! It's $39.95. Thrity nine dollars and ninety five cents! That's it. That's all you pay. Every month. For a new pair of shoes. Shut the front door.

idioms anyone?

I guess it's time to spill the beans about our moving plans.

We're moving.

Whew. There. I said it. Cat's out of the bag. The lid's come off. It's out in the open. It's no longer under...well you get the picture.

We're not going far, but we are moving out of our beloved little neighborhood for the time being. Basically, we were faced with an offer we just couldn't refuse [please re-read that sentence in a Godfather voice, k thanks]. Bigger house, less rent. And since we're such smart cookies, we jumped on the opportunity. The hope is that we'll be able to get some money socked away sooner, buy a house, and move back to our beloved little neighborhood.

But it's not all peaches and cream over here. The house is kind of a disaster area, so we've got to get cracking if we're gonna get it in ship shape before we move in. Not to mention we're cuttin' it pretty close, considering we've got less than two months before our deadline. That may seem like a piece of cake, but Boyfriend and I do have full-time jobs. So we'll be burning the midnight oil for weeks to come.

At the end of this, I'll be in dire need of a manicure, a massage, and a couple drinks.

Any skilled laborers volunteers to help us on our race against time to get our new house in order??? Anyone?

thank you mamie eisenhower

Thank you for this.

In case you're wondering, I've been spending all of my time here. Trying to vanquish the hot pink madness that is this bathroom.

Also, if you're wondering, I will be there again tonight. And tomorrow. And the next day. And so on.

Cross your pretty little fingers and perhaps I'll get to divulge a complete update soon. I have a several photos just as scary as these.

Excited yet?

two things you know nothing about & banana bread

I just made banana bread. On a Saturday morning. Before 8 o'clock.

I'd say I officially rock. Or rule. Or am a domestic princess turned queen. My crown's in the mail folks. I have to send a special shout-out to GerRee for the inspiration. That is to say, when she was up super early (before the sun, I think) a couple weeks ago she made banana bread before the hubbers even woke up, and it appears I'm on track to do the same today with Boyfriend. But had she not mentioned it to me, I'm certain the thought wouldn't have popped into my head this morning. At 6:30.  [sidenote: I've been steadily working on home improvement projects that I will breakdown for you later, but for now just know I have broken nearly every nail in that awkward imgonnaripyournailbelowthequick kinda way. And Left Hand Pointer Finger Nail, or LHPFN for short, keeps folding in half when I type. Ok, that was more like a side-story, but it's really buggin the shit outta me.] Boyfriend will be so excited when he wakes to the smell of fresh baked banana bread and macadamia nut coffee wafting through the house. In fact, he'll probably put a rush on that crown just to make sure it gets here super quick and people aren't under the assumption I'm still a lowly domestic princess. (For good measure I'll go ahead a fry some bacon too.)


It also comes to mind that had GerRee and I not taken our TV challenge [another topic I have yet to discuss-bad blogger!], I might have just sauntered into the living room, plopped on the sofa, and fallen under the spell of crap MTV before even coming out of my sleep fog. It also helps that I'm uber excited and motivated to work on the aforementioned, but not elaborate upon, house projects. So there. Two things you know nothing about are the reason I'm blathering on at 7:30 in the morning. Aren't you happy I decided to share this with you? I know I am. 


Update: I did in fact fry bacon. Boyfriend was pleasantly surprised by the banana bread. Ok, let's face it-he was shocked! Also, I fixed Boyfriend's necklace, which has been on the to-do list for months. And I repaired the dress form Mary got me, so I can shoot stock photos for mary&nell. Yipee!

what my summer is missing

what my summer is missing by asia.marie featuring 18 karat gold jewelry

Dorothy Perkins green top
£26 - dorothyperkins.com

G by Guess strappy platform heels
$70 - gbyguess.com

Amrita singh jewelry
$20,000 - amritasingh.com

Marc by Marc Jacobs letter jewelry
$200 - shopbop.com

Gorjana 18 karat gold jewelry
€45 - styleserver.de

Locket jewelry
$14 - lulus.com

Eugenia kim hat
$335 - net-a-porter.com

Emilio Pucci 1950s
fashion.1stdibs.com

I'm no longer awkward!

It's true. Writing about my awkwardness and awesomeness must be helping me rid myself of the awkward elements because I just can't think of any. Seriously. The totally random dream I had about a totally random person doesn't count. (no, I'm not telling you.) And I don't think getting swamp ass at work counts either. (it's Texas in. the. summer.) And neither does dropping the F bomb in front of your friend's small children you haven't seen in well over a year...and then doing it again. Ok, so maybe those do count. Damn. I guess I'm not losing any awkwardness.

Fine. Then on to awesome. I'm awesome. Nuff said.

Oh, and The Help [thanks Seester!]. And Harry Potter movie marathons. Oh, and Rahr brewery. And $5 pizza with garlic butter sauce! Awesome!!

And now for a little mary&nell lookbook teaser [everyone likes pretty pictures, right?]:

back to the future

I'd say I have a case of the Mondays, but it's Wednesday. So, I don't know what I have. If it was Monday, then I would be sharing these photos on the day they took place, albeit four hours ahead of time, in which case it's really like I've traveled back in time. Maybe I do have a case of the Mondays...

Yo peeps, it's Thursday!

 

Awkward

1. Imagining me saying "yo peeps" outloud

2. Adding up the amount of time you spend per week watching TV. Yeah, go ahead. I dare you.

3. Laughing HYSTERICALLY at Melissa and Joey while Boyfriend makes his "this is lame" face.

4. When other people notice you laughing at jokes from their completely separate, often private, conversation.

5. The high-pitched squeals that escape every time you mention how close the Harry Potter release is! 

Awesome

1. Visits from GerRee!

2. Tapatias. Mmmmmmmm (asada tacos are THE BEST)

3. Making my first sale on Etsy! Woot woot!

4. New jobs! (not me, but awesome anyway!)

5. New babies! (again not me, but yay Chad and Steph! Tripp Lawson, born July 4th!)

mary miles & jo nell hinshaw

Hi. Remember when I hinted to you about my special project? Of course you don't...that was over a month ago. You can catch up here. I'll wait.

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K, back on the same page? Well guess what?! I did it. I launched my very own Etsy shop, and I named her mary&nell. After bouncing several ideas around [I was convinced for a while that the name had to include the word ninja], I decided to name her after two very important women–my grandmothers.

The naming process happened over a few beers at a local pub. (ok, so no one here say pub...but that shouldn't stop me, right?!) Boyfriend and I were sipping on Shiners while I jabbered on about what I could name my shop. It went something like this:

"It should totally have ninja in the name."

"Uh, ok."

"Seriously, because ninjas are cool. And I'm a ninja. A shopping ninja."

"Sure."

"You don't think so?"

"Ummmm...do what you want, babe. It's your shop." (That's boy for, No I don't think so. It's a terrible idea, but I don't want to tell you that and argue. I just want to sit here and enjoy my beer)

"I knooow....but what do you think? I really need you're input."

"No, I don't think it should say anything about ninjas. You should probably think about why you're doing this and what it means."

Enter blank stare.

Boyfriend is a genius for a couple reasons: #1. His advice is spot on. Of course I didn't need to give the shop some silly moniker because at that moment I thought it was kinda cute. It needed substance. #2. Boyfriend got me to quit yammering about some silly name and could enjoy his Shiner.

So, there I sat, staring at my boy genius considering the advice he had just given me, and I had to be real with myself. Ninjas, however cool they are, had nothing to do with my shop. Drat! Somewhere between beer one and three I came to the conclusion that I wanted my shop name to be actual names. At that point, the naming process happened pretty quickly...

My grandmothers were probably two of the most influential people of the crafty/creative/artistic side of me. I grew up exploring my maternal grandmother's shop, where she made her living as a seamstress. My grandmother, Mary would make all of us granddaughters nightgowns and dolls and all sorts of things that lit up little girls' eyes. She would even help me with sewing projects of my own. Mary now runs a general store out of the that same shop, its contents ranging from four sack aprons [the cutest things ever] to books to small groceries and sodas. I have always admired her crafting and sewing abilities as well as her head for business.

I never knew my paternal grandmother, Jo Nell, but I have felt close to her my entire life. I grew up in the house she and my grandfather (more affectionately known as Bapa) built and raised my dad and aunt in. Many of her belongings lived in the back room of the house. Her sewing machine, patterns, fabric, ribbons, charcoals, paints, drawings, and so on. My entire childhood and teen years were spent perusing, cataloging, and using her things. I would lose entire afternoons going through her supplies and giving them a new life. I drew with her charcoals, decorated with her ribbons, and sewed on her machine. In fact, her machine lives at my house, and I used it for over 20 years until I was gifted a new sewing machine this past Christmas.

Starting off, mary&nell is a vintage clothing shop where I hope to share handpicked items that I adore. Soon, I want to see some of my own handmade items in the shop, and eventually menswear and homegoods. I certainly can't predict how mary&nell will grow and what it will become, but I hope naming her after these two amazing women will help to remind me what hard work and creativity look like.

 

sneaky monsters & old photographs

Mourning can be a very sneaky monster.

It's been three years since the fire that put my dad in the hospital, robbed us of our family home, and took the life of my beloved Scout. [If you don't have any idea what I'm talking about, you can read about it here.]

I never really considered mourning the loss of a home. Certainly I had thought about mourning the loss of a pet, but I could have never imagined the depths of grief I would experience after the losing Scout and our Honeysuckle home. It's been three years, and though the wounds aren't raw anymore they are very much a part of me, wounds I feel may forever scar my heart. Three years later, this is what mourning looks like.

I still have dreams set at the Honeysuckle house. This phenomenon started happening about 10 months after the fire, and initially occurred at an alarming rate of five to seven times a week. Usually they have nothing to do with the house or the fire, it's just the setting.

I think of Scout often. Sometimes her name tries to come out when I call for Lucy or Latch (most especially that recent blonde addition). And though time has passed and the hole left in my heart has gotten smaller, I still miss her dearly.

The memory of dad on the ventilator is something that hasn't gotten much more bearable with time. It is a picture that still causes me to reach to God for support. Dad is fine. He's more than fine, actually. He's really great. There's just something about that first moment when I saw him hooked up to the machines fighting for his life, my mom at my side, my siblings not yet able to be there, feeling so very small and helpless...three years later that memory can break my heart all over again.

The conversation with GerRee. I remember looking at my feet, walking down the hallway, making my way outside, and trying to figure out how I was going to have that conversation with my sister. The one where I told her Dad was in the Parkland ICU Burn Unit and our family home had burned. The one where I tried not to freak her out and give her as many details as I could but I couldn't make my mind stop racing. The one where I would break my sister's heart. I remember getting to a place where I was sort of lost trying to relay information and just stopped. I didn't know what to say next. With very slow and deliberate speech, GerRee said "I need you to tell me the condition of our father." My feelings surrounding that conversation still make me squeeze my sister a little tighter every time I see her, and wish I could snuggle up to her and hold her hand more often. My sister. My heart.

Shortly after the fire, we also lost Bonnie. Somehow this gets thrown into the the big ol' mess of loss surrounding the fire. I guess because it sort of became a year of loss, the way things seemed to drag out. And that sweet, sweet family dog was very dear to all of us, most especially my dad. Bonnie's passing marked another sorrow in a year of so many ups and downs.

Writing about so much of this for the first time makes me realize I probably should have started a long time ago. I suppose it's been pretty cathartic to finally put some "pen to paper". But I certainly don't want to leave you with the impression that I'm some walking ball of grief 24/7. Like I said, mourning can be a sneaky monster, sometimes springing from nowhere. Sometimes springing from what would otherwise be pleasant memories, as was the case today. It's been three years, and even though there is still a fair amount of heartache, there is much more happiness. Our family has so much to be thankful for, and I am blessed to belong to a family that recognizes and appreciates that fact.

To conclude this kind of a downer post [so sorry], I will leave you with really cute photos I have close by. That'll make up for it, right?!